Cardiac Commas Return to the Playoffs

Following the apocalyptic Snowstorm Nemo, the Commas had to play Game 5 in nearly a foot of snow, in a rematch with New Jack City. The conditions slowed down both teams, leaving the score deadlocked at 6 (Daniel had scored following an interception by Max). Three long drives for the Commas expired at the New Jack one yard line until, at last, Oxford scored with 20 seconds to go on a quarterback sneak, Bart Starr-style. It looked like they had it in the bag, but then New Jack threw a bomb down field, between a colliding Max and Daniel, for a score. They would put the ball into the end zone again for the extra point, giving them a dramatic 13-12 victory. To get their minds off of the game, Oxford played a half against the Multiple Scoregasms, whose game had been canceled because the other team (Da Browns, from last week) had wussed out and forfeited, apparently thinking that football is played on a beach in Hawaii or something. I'm blocking out the last-second loss, and instead pretending that we only had the scrimmage.

Walking in a winter wonderland...



A week later, the Commas played the undefeated Button Holes in a rollicking shootout. Oxford took an early lead, but the Button Holes slowly chipped away and briefly went ahead 42-38. With a minute to go, Daniel scored on a deep throw along the sideline, making it 44-42. The Button Holes then marched down the field and, with two seconds left, went ahead for good with a throw to their big tank of a receiver (Ash was injured on the play in a valiant effort). Because, you know, we needed more last second drama this year. Still, it was a great game, with huge plays from Daniel, Jon, Paul, and Jessica.

QB sneak for a score:



A scramble and a near-score:



Jessica jukes the defender for a touchdown:



Daniel scores with about a minute left, giving Oxford the lead (cameraman Tim is nearly at a loss for words):



On the extra point, Dan runs what is either the best decoy or the worst route ever, and Matt nearly comes down with the throw:



The Commas had to face the Button Holes again in the first round of the playoffs and, unfortunately, the blue team came with reinforcements. The Commas tried to keep up, but the BHs had four receivers who made plays all over the field...and now in my nightmares. Oxford went into halftime down 24-7 (Daniel scored), and managed to get within a touchdown early in the second half thanks to scores by Max and Dan. Also, Jane played well in Jessica's absence at QB. But the Button Holes just kept scoring. Final score: 40-20. The Button Holes went on to beat New Jack in the championship. (So, we at least continued our streak of losing to the eventual champs.)

And so, perhaps the craziest season ever comes to a close, and my pacemaker is grateful for the break. We will return in the fall, and may make a guest appearance on Daniel's "mistress" team Bonestorm (yes, they're named for a Simpsons reference).

Enjoy the Inspirational Football Clip of the Week. And try to stay in shape this offseason, will you? No more McGriddles.

Daniel acts all cool after catching a pass:



A long march down the field, with receptions by Max, Jane, and Jon:



Jane nearly sneaks in:



Commas tie it up with a score to for Daniel:



Max gets the conversion:



You know things are desperate when we try man-to-man defense:



Max gets a big chunk of yardage:



Dan almost walks off the field in protest, but we finally decide to throw him the ball:



Let's pretend Dan didn't step out of bounds on this one, shall we?



Max toes the line:



He's so fast!



Commas season draws to a close:



(Highlights courtesy of Joe.)